


An Operatic Scream

by raven_crow_kids



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: F/M, I Demand More Gansey Panic Attack Content, Panic Attacks, blue is a very concerned gf, but for once this isn't about them, everyone thinks gansey has musical talent, gansey ignores his problems, gansey is one praise starved boi, idk I just wanted more panic attacks in this fandom, it's more likely than you think, really the recovery after a panic attack, ronan and adam are there too, using a henrietta accent to manipulate your bf into healthy mental practices?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-14 20:48:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29302191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raven_crow_kids/pseuds/raven_crow_kids
Summary: Gansey screamed.Blue heard him, and Adam heard him, and Ronan heard him, but for approximately 2.6 seconds, none of them moved, choosing instead to listen. This was because Gansey’s screams were now a regular occurrence, and they had taken on an almost musical quality in the meantime.ORGansey has a panic attack and they're all sort of tired of it.
Relationships: Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	An Operatic Scream

Gansey screamed.  
Blue heard him, and Adam heard him, and Ronan heard him, but for approximately 2.6 seconds, none of them moved, choosing instead to listen. This was because Gansey’s screams were now a regular occurrence, and they had taken on an almost musical quality in the meantime. Adam almost enjoyed the sound, then chastised himself for the cruelty.  
At the exact same pinprick in time, they all heaved out of their respective beds to do their respective chores. Ronan was to make the tea, Adam, to prep the blanket nest, and Blue to find Gansey. This was a rotating schedule, and their movements were of oiled clockwork.  
Blue had the hardest job, as Gansey had unconsciously discovered numerous hiding places around Monmouth, too many of them revolving around the dusty first floor. As always, she checked his bed first, and as always, it was empty. She really should’ve known better.  
“Going down,” she called through the silence, and the pot of boiling water whistled in response.  
The stairwell tasted musty as usual. A scream rang through the world again and Blue wondered if Gansey might not have any musical ability. But that was stupid. She was just tired.  
“Darling?” she said, fumbling for the light switch. “We’re all waiting. Don’t make us wait.” Blue had learned at the beginning that framing Gansey as the one in the wrong was a quick way of uncovering him. Of course, that was of no use if he was still lost in his mind.  
Blue thought for the thousandth time if she should permanently move into his room. It was not what he wanted, but at this point Gansey's opinion wasn’t worth much on this matter. Whether or not he wanted her to see the panic attacks was irrelevant.  
A scrabbling sound came from the corner just as Blue remembered that the wiring down here had gone out in the last big storm. Perfect.  
“Gansey?” Blue murmured, stumbling in the direction she’d heard the noises. “Did you hear me? Adam is waiting. Ronan’s getting bored. Ronan gets into trouble when he’s bored. I’m not happy-” Blue couldn’t bring herself to say ‘with you.’ Lying for the others was hard enough. She couldn’t fake her own displeasure with Gansey any further than that.  
“You are?” he whispered ahead of her.  
“Yes. Very, very unhappy.”  
“How-how can I fix it?” Oh, his voice. Raw from screaming and delicate as his mother’s glassware collection. Blue nearly cried.  
“The only way to fix it is if you come upstairs with me. Then everything will be better.”  
There was a series of sniffles, then a resolute cough, and the darkness moved, shifting to accommodate Gansey’s erratic steps. He walked, zombie-like, into Blue’s arms, and let her lug him over to the rectangle of light that was the doorway. His face had thin gray lines that meant scratches. Blue thought he had gotten past that.  
“I already feel better,” she whispered into his ear, gripping the railing. “You’re doing very well. Keep walking.”  
She kept up a steady stream of praise as he climbed the mountain of stairs. The closer they got to the soft light of the second floor, the worse Gansey looked. Various nicks peppered his cheekbones and jawline, as if he was itching to get at the bone beneath his skin, the most solid parts of himself. The Aglionby uniform he’d never changed out of was soaked through with sweat and clung fiercely to the curves of his figure. His fingernails housed a deluge of blood tinged with a minty scent.  
They reached the top at last, greeted with the warm embrace of Adam and Ronan. The blanket fort stretched out behind them, a tray of chamomile sat beside it. Ronan went for bandages.  
“Hey, bud,” Adam said softly. “I’m so proud of you.” He didn’t say why, and Gansey didn’t ask, only accepted the encouragement. He found himself covered in a thick layer of blankets moments later, padded on either side by a friend. Ronan materialized in front of him, carefully applying a stinging cream and making clicking noises with his tongue that released something inside Gansey.  
“You’ve been so good,” promised Blue. “Will you tell us what happened? What did you see?”  
Gansey shied away from the question, and Adam was struck with how similar this night felt compared to all the others.  
Ronan used his thumb to smooth out the creases in Gansey’s face while simultaneously spreading the homemade mixture around. “Please.”  
Ronan didn’t say please. “I saw… me. But I was small. A kid. And it was like the first time I died, but I wasn’t alone this time. You were all there too. And the hor- the hornets killed you first. And then they came to me.” Gansey reached for a mug of tea, but Blue had to hold the base for him to keep it from spilling.  
“Alright,” she said. “Thank you for telling us. But Gansey, do you remember what we talked about a few nights ago? A therapist?”  
He recoiled. “Blue- I- I don’t want to talk about this right now.”  
She traced the curve of his ear and watched him relax minimally. “No one wants to make you nervous, Gansey, but we have to talk about this.”  
“I- I’m trying to save money. Like Adam wants me to.”  
“I have a therapist,” cut in Adam, exasperated.  
“What-” began Ronan, but Blue cut him off with a sharp look. She had an idea.  
“Gansey,” she purred, letting the full, round vowels of Henrietta seep into her voice. His name was a drawl that went on for hours. “You don’t have to say anything now, but we’re going to talk about this in the morning. Alright, darling?”  
Gansey struggled to stay upright. “Promise me,” she whispered in a tone that melted like butter and loosened the tightest pieces of him. “Promise.”  
He nodded and searched for her mouth with his lips. Blue obligingly kissed him, painfully aware of Adam and Ronan a few inches away. One of Gansey’s hands came up to tangle in her hair and she let him, plucking out some clips to make room.  
“Thank you,” she mumbled into his teeth.  
He didn’t reply. Couldn’t reply, as it was. Blue’s kisses always left him speechless, some ways more literally than others. This was not a problem.  
More tea. More reassurances. No more discussion of difficult topics.  
Dawn.

**Author's Note:**

> First contribution to this amazing fandom! LEAVE A REVIEW.


End file.
